Updated: Sep 8, 2019
My mother gets her hair cut across the street from my apartment, so when she has her appointment, I meet her for lunch afterwards. Last time she got her hair cut, I arrived a little early as she was getting her hair blown out. When her hair was done, I watched her look in the mirror at the finished product and could see her struggle with the image that was reflected back to her. She tucked her hair behind her ears, she fluffed it a little here or there, but it wasn’t the hair she was wrestling with, it was who she saw when she looked in the mirror. She couldn’t rationalize the image in the mirror with how she saw herself in her mind. The images didn’t match. Do you feel like this sometimes? You look in the mirror and the image reflected back to you doesn’t match how you feel about yourself? There is a disconnect between the reflection and our mind’s eye. It certainly does for me. Whether it is age, emotional pain, exhaustion, hurt or happiness that is the lens we look through, who is reflected back to us doesn’t always align with how other's see us. Wouldn’t it be nice if we were able to see ourselves as our friends and family do? They don’t see gray hair, crinkly eyes, extra weight, nights unslept, stories of hurt from our past that we continue to carry with us. They see our heart. They see what we bring to their lives and they see the good in us. So how do we capture that same positivity in our minds eye so that when we look in the mirror, what is reflected back is the best version of ourselves? The version of ourselves that the people who love us see. Can we train our minds eye to view ourselves as lovingly and thoughtfully as possible? I think we at least have to try.
I have been working on training my mind’s eye for positivity in a couple of different ways. First, I started putting my phone in another room when I sleep. This helps me to clear the clutter in my mind before sleep, set positive intentions for the night’s sleep and the next day, oh, and actually sleep! The second thing I have started doing is sticking to a morning routine. Once the alarm on my phone rings, I get up to turn it off (having the phone in the other room has also helped to eliminate hitting the snooze button) and go straight to my living room to a guided meditation. I LOVE Gabby Bernstein’s morning meditation or find any that work for you on YouTube and then write intentions for the day in a journal. I heard something I loved from Rachael Hollis (interview on
Tom Bilyeu Podcast Impact Theory) don’t create a To Do list, create a Results list. The Universe needs the intention as a result in order to act - I have financial security, not I will have financial security. I make healthy choices when I eat, not I will make healthy choices when I eat. I take care of my body and am healthy. I drink gallons of water to hydrate my body and skin. This result focused intention sets a tone not only of positivity, but also of accomplishment so I start my day with a feeling of achievement that I want to build on. It's a first step toward seeing myself more positively. What do you think?!